Wednesday, May 19, 2010

too many thoughts before bed

oh man i'm wigging out right now. i just finished this murder/mystery/suspense novel by mary higgins clark. i can see why many ppl like her (my first time reading something by her) but i am officially FREAKED!!!! i seriously double checked the dead bolt like forty times at my apartment. ahhhhhh. 3 murderers in one community (one novel)? i realize it's fiction but are they that common!!! ahhhhhhhh thought #1.

thought #2. i miss aubrey grace loud :( like BAD. i was just looking at shelbs and josh's blog. :( i wish i could visit with my mom and caleb in a couple weeks.

thought #3. i hate Satan.

mission prep is freakin INTENSE but i'm learning a lot, becoming more open minded, growing a lot, and feeling blessed to be enrolled in that class. thought #4.

thought #5. i freakin LOVE chase!!!! like seriously. i know things will be "weird" when we're back in person but i can't imagine feeling anything but bliss for that man. when we were together= a bliss. while we're apart= still bliss. when we're back together= i'm guessing BLISS. it's all different levels of sheer wonderful bliss.

thought #6. i have been working on julie's bday gift all day and i'm DYING to show her. one thing that some people consider my weakness- i'm the WORST at surprises for christmas and birthdays. ahhhhhhh. i can last one more week of keeping it a secret.

i cannot wait to go camping with my andersons memorial day weekend. cannot wait. i need some nature healing four-wheeling loving family heartfelt joyful sunny days :) thought #7

i cannot wait to get my endowments out in.... 3 months i'm hoping :) thought #8

i have SOOOO much to be looking forward to. that much is very obvious- but i'm dancing in the rain and sunshine presently!!!!! even though the future is awesome. so is the present! i am grateful for every second (before i'm killed by my creepy neighbor/ serial killer like natalie or emily in the novel i just read!) thought #9

heidi and spencer are seriously HILARIOUS. that's the first adjective i'd use. the second would be "future mary higgins clark characters for her next serial killer novel". and third adjective- absolutely insane! hahha thought #10

thought #11 i seriously LOVE chase. did i already use that as a thought? well he is my every other thought so that makes sense. today he told me: eu amo voce muito! voce e tudo para mim! yah portuguese is sexy and romantic.
"since he liked it, he went and put a ring on it. don't be mad just because he knew what he wanted. oh oh ohhhhh oh oh oh oh oh. "
hahahaha i crack myself up

thought #12 i miss taylor tremendously but am VERY grateful for his daily texts and our updated close friendship. he is seriously saving me..... everyday! i love you tii :)

bridal showers. invites. weddings. is wedding season over yet? PLEASE! freak nasty. thought #13

i'm obsessed with this song introduced by the beautiful lauryn and dapper steve "if i die young" so if i die young, oh blog readers. please..... have me proxy-sealed to chase (that's not legit but try to swing it and convince upper authority. k thanks) make SURE all those people that throughout my life i have made promise to sing at my funeral do actually sing (i.e. shelby, kelly, elder kirn, and anyone else who is shy- make sure u tell them it was my death wish. SOLOs from each of them. guilt trip them) and lastly- make sure you go through all my journal entries (don't judge what you find) but look for all those entries i've ever written about my funeral arrangements. i've made entries now and then since i was 10 yrs old or so hahhahahahahhha. there are a few poems i wrote that need to be written and a will is in there i'm sure thought #14

thought #15 wow after that last post- i should really go to bed. i'm embarassing myself

thought #16 i am so excited kelly invited me over tomorrow :) i'm still a welcomed third wheel. holla!

bachelorette.... 4 days!!!! thought #17

i miss my family in texas a lot and i miss garrett here :( thought #18

thought #19 i am SOOOOOO glad summer is actually embracing this frigid land!!

thought #20 i know my Savior lives. I love Him.

Amen to it all :) Good night!