Monday, April 25, 2011

wrong April 25

so it's not my Pday. it's not April 25, 2012 (which would have been the last day of my 12th transfer and I would be done with an 18 month mission.) Well.... sometimes life doesn't go the way we plan. It's all about what He has in His plan. And when I say He and His- I mean God. He doesn't micromanage us, but if we are living righteously, we can understand and follow His will.
What I'm trying to say (in a really unclear way) is that I am no longer full-time 18 month Temple Square Sister Schroedter. I am 6 month RM Houston Sister Schroedter.
That's right- I'm home. Well not home as in heaven with God but home as in with my parents.
I was honorably released for health reasons. In a way, I saw this coming because my health is so silly. But in another way, I feel like this is a nightmare I'm going to wake up from at any second. I miss saving souls every hour of the day, laughing with my T-square sisters (esp Sis Hansen), and just being able to where the tag of Christ on my person and be His missionary and disciple.
I don't really have much to say and am honestly too emotional to talk about it anymore. I cry a lot but I have nothing to be sad about really because I got to serve full-time for 6 months, my testimony is rock solid, and I have so many blessings. I'll be okay. I've been through worse and the good thing about all trials and tests- Christ is always there.
And yesterday was Easter, so real perspective was shown and this life and the sufferings in this life really are but a small moment. Ok well being on this blog is actually really freaking me out because I feel like I'm being disobedient- haha it will take me a couple days to adjust! I barely let my mom out of sight at the grocery store today- SIGHT AND SOUND! Where's my companion?
I still feel the Holy Ghost as my companion and Comforter. If you want to talk to me- you can email me or call my house phone but as for facebook and a cell phone- I'm holding off as long as possible. Everything is freaking me out- Don't be offended if I haven't talked to you or called you about any of this- I'm trying to handle it all as best I can and not go to that dark place or get too overwhelmed.
And besides I really have only called those that are (or will be) eternally sealed to me and Kelly. Bahahahah. I love a lot of things and am counting my many many many blessings and with time, prayer, and perspective- I'm sure I'll love this new chapter I'm embarking on and gain that Godly perspective and understanding. Sorry this blog isn't what you were expecting- I really am sorry and wish it wasn't so. But I know God lives and that we have a living Savior who gave up the ghost and took up His life again so we may all live again! Luckily, these truths NEVER change- whether or not your world is shattered and completely changed- the gospel can and is always a rock :) Hallelujah!
These are some of the last moments. I love my Sister Hansen!! Smiling- one of our favorite things to do is fake it till you make it!
It seriously took 10 minutes for me to let go! I hope I didn't leave bruises- I love you Sister Hansen! You are an amazing missionary for Jesus Christ!!! I miss you!!!
One of the most selfless things I had to do and the most conflicting moments ever! I love the Utah- Salt Lake City, Temple Square mission!!!!!!!

6 comments:

Laura said...

Wow, my prayers are with you. When I saw your blog header at first I thought I was on the wrong blog... I loved reading about your mission and all the amazing experiences. You will have more! They won't be on temple square but they will be wonderful as well. Take care, I hope your health improves and you continue to be the great person you are (as I saw through your blog).

Janene said...

Hi there. This is Sister Littlejohn (the old one) Sister Littlejohn's mom. I drove with Alison AKA Sister Littlejohn to Provo and we stopped by the Square on the way to taking me to the airport and heard the news that you were home. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Please take care of yourself. Alison loved being your companion. We found out that your baptism (Evan from Kentucky) was taught by a full time missionary who is from our stake (Elder Hock!) It certainly is a small world. Alison will fill you in on more details.

Lauryn said...

Love you.

Genevieve Larsen said...

Hugs, Love, and Good luck with the weirdness...it takes awhile!

Mr Adebayo Willson said...

My fiance and i get into a fights all the time. I knew that we needed something to stay together because he was pulling away from me day by day. Dr. Oye from abuyespelltemple@gmail.com really helped us stay together and became a closer couple. He did a love binding spell that worked perfectly! He started making more of an effort to talk to me about how he was feeling which helped us work through our problems so much better. My fiance tends to shut down whenever there is conflict and this spell helped him communicate with me. I can also tell that he is more attracted to me because he keeps sending me flowers at work and is always trying to touch me in some ways. It's actually really nice and I am very grateful to Dr. Oye and his temple at abuyespelltemple@gmail.com for all he have done for me!

Mr Adebayo Willson said...

My fiance and i get into a fights all the time. I knew that we needed something to stay together because he was pulling away from me day by day. Dr. Oye from abuyespelltemple@gmail.com really helped us stay together and became a closer couple. He did a love binding spell that worked perfectly! He started making more of an effort to talk to me about how he was feeling which helped us work through our problems so much better. My fiance tends to shut down whenever there is conflict and this spell helped him communicate with me. I can also tell that he is more attracted to me because he keeps sending me flowers at work and is always trying to touch me in some ways. It's actually really nice and I am very grateful to Dr. Oye and his temple at abuyespelltemple@gmail.com for all he have done for me!