Sunday, October 30, 2011

snuggle bug!!!

one of my favorite words/phrases is snuggle bug! i love it. i say it in a super whiney-baby-high-pitched voice and it always initiaties good snuggling! especially with this little guy-
i spent a lot of time this weekend snuggling with jacksie jacks baby jackson! ps his name is jackson. not all that weirdo-ness.
he is my cousin and the closest thing to caleb here and i love him oodles. especially how he kissed me on the mouth this weekend and it was unexpected. hahaha.
and how i riled him up and put him in a super hyper hyper mood and then he got yelled at by mom-weekend-lauryn since his parents are out sailing the world on a yacht being fabulous! he was so hyper. bouncing off the walls and being obnoxious. it was totally my fault. he got in trouble. i felt bad but he wasn't hurt. hahaha. i love jackson- he is my best snuggle bug!!!

also. this is exhibit A on how good baby is at spreading her germs. aka. 13 people in utah (that i know of) got sick becuase of this. we share my water all the time..... and she backwashes big time!!!
SO guilty!! so dang cutely perfect!
i also got to babysit elsie this time as well as mille :) we (millie and i) went to elsie's piano recital and it was fun and halloween themed and elsie was great! i love family!

spent a good amount of time with my andersons like always- thanksfully ciara didn't jump on me in rem sleep this time. i thank you :) you are growing up into a beauty queen babelicious!!! once the boys catch up to your growth spurting crazy height- you will be unstoppable!! xoxox ci ci!
oh man tomorrow i start my two-a-days. aka "operation get sexy for dec 21" plan will be in full swing! gotta get my sexiest! working out. haircut. tan bod. nails did. teeth whitening. the whole works!!! but this weekend helped jump kick my extreme work out mode- i am so sore...... i helped pack up laur and dall for two days and my calves literally shake from being so strained and pushed. they live on the fourth floor of their apartment building and have a butt load of crap. they've only been married a year but it looks like 40 yrs with all the boxes and luxuries they have- but i was happy to help and spend time with friends. haven't spent time with mike in forever.
ps also i had a magical movie moment when helping them move.
i was up on the trailer strapping down the couches and recliner because we were just about to leave and be done for the day. i'm up there, using all my weight to tighten the bungee chord, and SNAP!!! as i'm leaning back pulling- the chords snaps and i tumble to the concrete. but geoff literally catches me in the perfect baby cradle as i plummet to my death. it was a movie moment! thanks geoffrey. hahaha. they are moved out- but next week we move them in to their new place :) more adventures then i'm sure.

i feel very happy today- espeically happy. many reasons. church was great even though my eyelids were drooping the whole time- 9 oclock church is early- even though i wake up that early on normal days- church just makes the sun brighter when you walk out for church.
today was primary program day up in slc valley at the cousins'
jackson- see above pic- did so good and little kids are always so hilarious and entertaining when you put them at the pulpit.)
when they were singing (AKA SHOUTING) about the martyrdom of joseph smith, our whole pew was stifling laughter and trying to not be mortified at them belting about death not conquering!
third hours felt wasteful because they were talking about their wards' safety plans in case of an earthquake or something and who they would call. that's what i get for not going to my own ward i suppose. but lauryn tickled my back and dallin's back all of church- i'm such a third wheel!

i think i feel so happy because i have stability. i've had it for the past two years- it doesn't make sense considering how horrifying some things have been (i'm a planner and my plans haven't gone so smoothly) but i've really learned these last two years to NEVER turn your back on the gospel, hope, and the Lord. that's true stability. i'm proved to myself that i can be trusted and the Lord can trust me- when you lose that trust in yourself and you feel the Lord doesn't trusts you-that's no bueno. but these past couple's been a good growing time for me!
i'm all grown up for chase :)

and lastly- i must take this october 30th halloween eve night to say HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM- YOU BEAUTIFUL BUTTERCUP OF A SEXY SNOWFLOWER SUGAR RAY PLUM PEACH BABY CAKE WONDERFUL WOMAN!!!!!! happpppppppppppy birthday!!!!!!! i love you. i wish i could be there. but i'll do something awesome for your next milestone birthday- jump out of a cake or something. or not bug you for the whole year. or not bum one dollar from you. or something spectacular.
you are the best mom in the world for me- you are the ying to my yang and "the smoke to my high!" i love you so much and am who i am because of you- i know it mortifies you that you created THIS but you did and i am grateful for you :) i am 2/5 dad (just the way the cookies crumbles !!). 1/5 you. 2/5 just the fiery spirit that only God can take credit for!!!!
thank you for being the opposite of me in the best way! you have every strength i need and all the love i could want. xoxoxoox i love you, mamma sexy pants!!!!! hope you have a great birthday month- it ends tomorrow so take advantage of it.
dad is soooo lucky to have you as his snuggle bug (told you i'd shout that if you didn't give specifics you wanted me to say!!!! BLOG SHOUT OUT FROM THE ROOFTOPS FOR YOU MAMMA ON YOUR SPECIAL DAY!!!! october 30th some 30+ years ago.....the day you fought through the canal, the amniotic fluid was wiped from your eyes, the doctor spanked your booty, grandma mispelled your name, and you took your first breath that was so vital to my existence!!! (p.s. that graphic part was a gilmore girl reference!!) oh mom!!!!I LOVE YOU SO MUCH! i know this is just the birthday wishing you wanted!!! i love you!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

Friday, October 28, 2011

birthday number one

today is birthday number one blog post :) it's this guy's birthday!!!!

i love you, elder anderson. (on the right in white ;) he looks good like that!!!)
it's been a blink of an eye in our eternity :)

the big 22!!!! you've finally caught up to me! i'm still your cougar though ;)

i can't believe THIS was only two years ago- to the day! it feels like it was six years ago!

birthday number two is coming up :) on sunday- my beautiful mother. still clinging to the 40's :) i'll write a blog post just for her then!

today i have the privelage of doing some millie and elsie time :) i'm excited!
i've got laundry and homework on my plate till then.
next week i swear i'm going to do the gym hardcore- this week i just used my deathbed as my excuse every day :) and this flu is contagious like a yawn! the whole anderson family and the whole anderson neighborhood and others have been infected. yeah sorry about that!
hopefully i can get up there today so i can get my letter that's waiting and watch 17 miracles :) with my beautiful anderfamily!
because of my sickness i didn't make it to the temple this week and it hurt- i need it. i can't wait to go next week. i love that holy home. i swear i'm more unstable. hahaha- it's all mental or it's all heartful or spiritual- wtv it is- it's abstract and real!

this morning i've teared up twice because i read two blogs that broke my heart.
one was reflecting on tragedy that has turned into a beautiful heartbreak.
and the other- i could sense she was going through her heartbreak right now and wasn't quite at the beautiful part yet.
reading and reflecting on these- it was a big moment- i had to think back at my own life and count my many blessings. especially the 7.5 week blessing coming up. health. my healing life. my growing family. my mission. my post-adjustment mission. my education. my needs met. my lessons learned. my repentance continuing. my rock. my testimony. and just everything.
life is beautiful and whether we lose perspective for a second or not- we will be okay. this gospel is beautiful and is the only and most reliable source for that beauty!!
p.s. one last rant- from being sick i'm still in this one tree hill marathon and i just think what all these pop culture shows would be like if they knew the whole plan of happiness. ha! it'd make them even more beautiful, happy, and full of love- even the cheeseball kind of love!

well back to the purpose of this post. Happy Birthday, CHASE!!!!

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

only 20 minutes

today is a day of miracles!

1. The flu has come and gone. The miracle part being GONE. it took twice as long as the average flu but it's still peaced out!
2. Chase taught a whole congregation of Pentecostals- the pastor invited them right up and those beautiful missionaries testified! wow! Also- it's his birthday friday. and he was a miracle baby and a miracle angel to me.
3. I got a year supply of contacts in the mail yesterday- because i need them but i CANNOT put them in. well i figured if i bought a year supply- that would motivate me to figure out how to unnaturally stick them on my treasured pupils. so i did! it took ONLY 20 MINUTES!!! the last time i tried contacts it took over two hours of failing and i gave up..... only 20 minutes..... i'm impressed :)

also THIS VIDEO impresses me (thanks for sharing misty)
you'll love it. i do :)

soon my heart will be in the same time zone!!!!

Monday, October 24, 2011


i hope you pronounced that word properly. aka like megamind. Mul-on-ku-lee!!!
Today i have been feeling melancholy. Ok that's an understatement.
Not emotionally melancholy but physcially melancholy.
I've been sick! A different kind of sick. You see, Garrett and Millie just got back from Houston. When they were there, my whole household got the 24 hour flu. Pain and grossness coming out of both ends and just pure misery. Well this weekend I babysat Millie (overnight at the Andersons- yah my life is funny) and it seems I got the bug. I woke up today and wanted to die. I'll spare the details but it was guh-ross. I spent the whole day in bed, watching One Tree Hill on dvd, and working on Chase's Christmas presents. I always brag about how high of a pain tolerance I have- well today I wasn't too impressive in that category.
At one point in the afternoon, I went on an errand/favor for Paul and I had to pull over and puke on University Ave. That was embarrassing. If you saw someone in a red toyota pull over and puke out the driver's door- that was me.
Then we went to the store to get some sprite and soup- had another blow out. Just exploded from every exit in my body- TMI i'm sure..... but i'm just relaying how horrifying my day has been.
Luckily the 24 hours are coming to an end and tomorrow will be a new day. Let's hope :)
Some good things about today-got my homework done, got some Christmas done, lost some weight, and skyped the beautiful Taryn. hence

sad thing about today- i was supposed to have a lovely day with kelly. 
another way reagan has changed our lives- she is too susceptible to sickness so i was band from spending the day at kelly's. it's a sacrifice i am happy to make to protect baby but normally i would just breathe all over kelly and not think twice. 
eh well- at least i'm still alive. 
being sick like this stinks- i would take being chronically ill (oh wait. check! wish granted) than experiencing a sickness like this a couple times a year. it's horrible. 
well it will help me remember to pray with gratitude for my health the next couple days- and then in a couple weeks i'll have forgotten how horrible being sick like this is and say i was just being a big baby and prolly neglect that gratitude part in my prayers. 
man, being a human is so full of shortcomings. i'll work on that!

Friday, October 21, 2011

says it all

this artsy crafty thing i put together..... says it all

Monday, October 17, 2011


let's make this quick. i have oodles of homework and need a nap more than anything- but i must blog as well.
so this weekend was amazing! i love my dad :) and getting to spend the whole weekend with garr and millie too!!! so much to say so let's have some pics do the talking first.

my dad txt me this :) my fam dropping him off at the airport. and i just have to say how much i miss them. i know christmas break is going to be awesome but i am quite sad i won't see them until march because of it. love y'all!
p.s. i love how caleb is the funniest, loudest, happiest, obnoxious, wild kid alive (well tied with me) and every pic...... coldstone mug shot!!

oh yeah thursday i got to go to the mt timp temple with lauryn and dallin. amazing. and this morning i went to the slc live sesh with kelly, lance, evan (kelly's bro going into the mtc wednesday) and kelly's dad. ALSO amazing :) i love the temple!!

everytime i've been calling the house lately my mom has been busy- teaching grant "homeschool drivers ed." now my mom isn't a bad driver (well no worse than any other female driver) but how is this a good idea?? grant driving and grant learning from a woman! oh beware of the roads! 
some of the cousins! on my dad side. SOME. like 12/85 cousins. hahaha.
we had a mini-partial-family reunion at the Lion House for my Grandpa Schroedter's 80th birthday shindig celebration hoopla!!
Schroedters! carrying the last name strong!!!
two of my favorites!!! she is an angel. that place is heaven! perfection! 
a great time with the fam. i hope ppl thought we were married. jk that's jacked up. but we are cute :) esp millie :)

garr, mill, and my dad are in texas now. i wish i was with them! i dropped them off sunday morning at the crack of dawn (but it's okay- i was awake the whole night anyways.... read on for more info)
so i dropped them off at the airport and went to my andersons :)
ciara.... ciara.... ciara........ she ALWAYS does this!!! i'm just in REM sleep and she pounces and burrows. ugh!! well in her defense.... this time it was 230 in the afternoon. i pulled an all nighter saturday night and didn't go to sleep till 830 AM. late night deep intense talks- those are some of my fav memories. i could talk for weeks straight. a talent? an annoyance? you decide :)
 this isn't right. i know. but it was on my phone and makes me laugh.
this says it all.
ps she got her wisdom teeth out today and her's + bryton's zero-pain tolerance= funny stuff.
if this photo of my blister (that i have had for over 4 months on the bottom of my foot) bothers you..... don't watch this video.......
it's honestly creepy how close the andersons and i are ;)
I LOVE the Andersons SOOOO MUCH :)
 p.s. um why did nobody warn me how expensive dry cleaning was? i honestly have never dry cleaned a thing- for the past 22 years i have been ok with being dirty or just normal washing- until this past week...... and i got my winter coats dry cleaned...... and should have just handed them my debit card and told them to snap it in two and suck it dry :( sad day. but i do have clean coats :) lesson learned. aka it'll be another 22 years till i can afford to go back.

this is a photo of my "personal metaphor" end class project final for my Adolescent Development class. it's a block class and wednesday is the last day!! can you believe the semester is half over? this class has been brutal. it's every wednesday from 4-8 pm. sooooo long- i get so squirmy!! but at least the end is in sight :)We had to creatively show our journey through adolescence. This paper I attached in this post went with this poster. We had to summarize briefly what our poster is portraying and write about one adult that helped us in our adolescent years. Hence.

I am anchored in my ever-changing world. From the age of 11 till my current age of 22, I have had  7 different homes under my parents roof and 12 homes since being in college.  The view in front of me is always different; however, my perspective and stance in the world is always constant. I have my faith, my family, my needs met, my self-identity, and an abundance of love that causes stability as I move from environment to environment.  I have had to be stronger within because my world was fragile. It was never for certain. There was no guarantee it would be there tomorrow.
 We could have a weeks’ notice or a semesters’ notice; I don’t know which one was harder. The most fragile part of my adolescence was the transitioning. However, we always had our family and a ward to attend. By age 11, I came to expect moving and felt more comfortable when my life did get turned upside down.  Moving became something I could rely on and expect.
My physical growth seemed to be average, but looked advanced or slow compared to the international peers around me. My cognitive thinking matured quickly because I had to create a home within myself with abstract concepts such as faith, family unity, and self-identity. My social growth and thinking was always changing because each environment introduced new scenarios and social crowds. I was placed in many different social scenes: the international hub of Singapore, the rural racism of Kentuckiana, the Mormon bubble of Utah, the proper poise of France, the foreign fashion of Japan, the intricate poverty of India, the relaxed adventure of Australia, the chic history of Italy, or the affluent patriotism of Texas. I am so grateful for my upbringing and all the factors of my adolescence.
One great factor in my adolescence was the adult-influence. My parents have always included me with adult conversations, game-nights with adults, and allowed me to spend time at the homes of other adults.  One great adult in my life was my neighbor in Kentuckiana; her name is Missy. She’s a teacher at Jeffersonville High School, a less than active member of the church, and a great friend to this day. When I moved to Kentuckiana at age 15, she treated me as if I were her close friend. I took her accounting class at school, thought of her classroom as a safe haven, and thought of her home as my second home. We talked about her relationships, my relationships, and anything we deemed important. She helped me cope with my life in Kentuckiana; I felt like I had entered the movie Mean Girls and I was the foreign American kid moving back to America. I wasn’t challenged at all in school because my Asian, private school was much harder than anything Kentuckiana had to offer. I got a job at Sonic to pass the time, and Missy also let me tutor her elementary-aged twins. After our tutoring session, I would stay to chat with Missy. She helped me by creating an environment where I felt needed, loved, and relaxed. She helped me transition into adulthood; she supported me, my decisions, and my thinking. I also loved this relationship because she helped me gain a stronger testimony in the gospel. Because she was less active, it helped me bare witness when I could and get her to come to church. This was crucial in retaining my identity during those hard years of Kentuckiana. Self-identity and self-worth is key during adolescence. I knew I was loved, a divine spirit, and anchored in the gospel. Her encouragement and friendship was a two-way street. I helped her, she helped me, and we were both edified. Missy was one of the many adults that influenced my social and cognitive thinking. She was a great reinforcement to my parents’ parenting and creating that stable environment amidst change.

Ok!!! now i really must get to my rhetorical analysis homework, take a nap, and then party tonight! party?? aka go with a big group to FOOTLOOSE!!! i've been waiting for this movie since i first caught wind of the rumor that they were remaking it! 
I love the original. i love Julianne Hough. I love dancing! it should be awesome!!

Thursday, October 13, 2011

a day to write home about

today was a day to write home about. but i don't snail mail home to Spring Blossom Court.....but i do call, text, heytell, skype, or facetime instead.
it was so glorious skyping with my beautiful mother yesterday. i was having a little bit of a melt down and there she was. just shining brightly in her pajamas on her bed as she nodded her head and really didn't have to say anything at all..... because i was just talking, venting, and blabbing away. she is such a good mom. she always brings me back down to earth, smacks me upside the head, and sends me on my way. i always feel better after talking to her or with her- whichever preposition fits best for that conversation. she is the bestest!!!

today i had an interesting conversation with my one and only wonderful sister about being easily swayed. she believes i am easily swayed. it's hard for me to decide (which proves right there that i am not easily swayed, but by the end of the convo i was sorta agreeing with her- which disproves my point.) i don't think i'm easily swayed because i'm stubborn, opinionated, and came out of the uterus with this personality- from the getgo- and it's remained constant.
but she says i'm easily swayed because i forgive easily, see the best in people, and like to please people. if you know how to manipulate me, you can get me to do what you want. hmmm....... i dont know.
this whole conversation stemmed from her being exasparated because boys don't know how to handle a girl with a missionary. if you want to win over a girl with a missionary this is what you must do.
1. don't put down the missionary. that causes a wedge. in fact, talk as little as possible about the missionary. don't talk about him, the situation, etc.
2. show her and stop telling her you'll win her over
3. as it progresses NORMALLY with you, she'll forget about him
but no.... guys do not seem to be able to do that. well....i don't let any guy have the opportunity to do that. but they could if they were more educated on how to handle a girl with a missionary (see above numbered outline.) 
 i purposefully have kept myself available to chase and my heart is his. it's a silly topic of conversation because my decision of being here for chase when he gets back- that i do not sway on.

today i put my two weeks in at work. it was monumental. i've worked there since i've been at byu.
i will let you know what happens with the work field- for the next few weeks, maybe for the rest of the semester- i'm just going to be watching millie to keep her out of daycare :) i worked at a daycare. it's a fine place- but i know better- i was behind the scenes. it's a last resort. but i am a resort here in provo that can keep millie from that daycare resort. kapeesh? (absolutely lost on the spelling. i even tried to google it- hopefully you know the word i'm referring to)

tomorrow i am getting my hair highlighted and cut :) i hope it will help this windblown mess of split ends :) i'm keeping the length- don't worry. ha who am i kidding- nobody cares. well i think chase would care if i went bald but even then- it's just hair.

i'm excited to pick up my DAD from the airport tomorrow :) it's gonna be the best weekend.

i have gotten so much done to give me a free weekend so i can focus on being with dad! today i woke up at 6h45 (yeah that's early. and ps yes i meant to put the "h"- it's a little bit of fran├žais for you) because i wanted to see if i could catch a glimpse of chase on email- LIVE. i was dying to talk to him like msn'ing. but to no avail. and it's not the most obedient thing. [almost obedient, almost blessed..... think on that]
so as i'm sitting on my comp REFRESHING my comp every five minutes, i got so much homework done! i honestly did! and got to go to the gym, drop off dry cleaning, shower, and do laundry! all before 1 pm- which is when i had to be at work- who knew the morning had the capacity for sooo many productive hours!

and to end this textbook long post- i had a wonderful experience today with God.
i got in touch with an old singapore friend today (thank you, fbook) and we exchanged numbers and were texting. i was driving to my class at the byu slc center and had this impression to give her information to the beautiful temple square sisters. so i talked to her a baby bit about my mission and she knows oodles about mormons from growing up with me and what not.
so i'm like- well if traffic is good and i have time..... WELL i got to slc 30 minutes early. that NEVER happens- especially if you know how utah handles their construction. aka they don't- it just sits there for years on end being obnoxious and blocking the way and causing utahns to break because they are scared baby mice that freak out when lanes curve. anyways. back to the spiritual matter at hand.
so i go to t-square, park on north temple, and tip-toe to the north visitor center. i say to myself "ok if i see someone i know at desk duty, i'll just sneak in, give them the name and info, and be on my way." WHO is at the desk? sister crandell!!! my second companion of the mish! she just got back from outbound (louisiana i believe) and i get to see her and give her this friend of mine!!!!!! so i do! it was amazing! it was a testimony to me of God's hand in our lives. and the angels we all have! sister crandell is one of those angels to me. i can't believe she comes home the same day as chase! i'm on the look out for an apt in my ward or even in my house for her for january :)
today was a good day. a long day! i just finished it with watching survivor with my possie!! i love reality and reality tv.  anyways-
ps i have seen an increase in my days and in my serenity as i have made prayer a deeper personal matter and been steady at attending the house of the Lord. there are so many beautiful temples around me! i'm excited to go to mt. timp temple tomorrow- i've never done a session there. that will conclude me visiting all the temples in happy valley and salt lake valley :) and now i can venture out of the valleys and also do repeats at the visited temples! the temples are beautiful! the Spirit is universal! the work is important :) missionary work here and there! i love days like today!

Sunday, October 9, 2011

corn is fun!

the sunset was way pretty- this pic doesn't do it justice!

went to cornbellys on a triple date with some of my favs :) 
becca, it had been too long. i forgot how much i need to miss you. good times!!! cornbellys has been a provo tradition since i've moved here. like haunted forest. byu football. zupas. and other partying it up activities. 

soooo fun:
corn maze
corn kernel pit
pic opportunities with all the props
massive trampolines
pumpking carvings
country music
haunted corn maze
haunted creature
lasso fun
spiderwebs (fake of course)
and scaring 14 yr old SKETCH children

in the haunted corn maze there were these annoying 12 yr old. 
who lets there 12 yr-olds go on like a 20-uplet date. it was like one massive hormonal, make out scene. get it together. 
anyways. there were these three girls at one point who had took off running and caught up to our group and ran into us (literally ran into paul) that was my date- hands off! (ps i think i'm a bad date because chase is always brought up. my b. it's getting worse as the time gets closer. i don't bring it up but it's a cloud of topic around me.) 
anyways, they stayed with us the rest of the maze and kept screaming and saying "this is sketch. so sketch. sketchy. sketch! sketch-a-roo. how sketch. sketchy!!" 
i use the word sketch like any other person but she was outta control. finally i turned around and shushed them and gave them the death glare. it worked for 5.4 seconds.
kelly and lance.
aj and becca.
paul and marissa.
my high quality camera. and there was smoke/fog/pollution/haze everywhere. not sure what the source was but it made pic taking SKETCH.
again. good quality. me climbing up a kid slide and kelly trying to scare me. fail.
the corn kernel pit. kernels EVERYWHERE..... hours later. still finding them. comfortable. kelly died. 
my college girls. minus annie. she'll be here soon :) nov 2 
oh they were bad. 
she thinks his tractor's sexy. 
always making friends. i hold hands with people quickly :)
she took this pic. so she will suffer the public sharing :)
becca allen echols (now if someone googles her names. they'll find this. hence!)

and then after cornbellys, we got krispee kreme donuts, made hot chocolate, and played taboo!! and hit or miss! but mainly taboo :) check the Taboo it up tab on this blog :)
p.s. my hair smells like smoke. yah i didn't shower- judge me later. i will before church!!!
don't judge me- i actually like the smell of smoke. not cig smoke but bonfire smoke :) yum! ok fine i'll go. peace out yo diggity!

Thursday, October 6, 2011

past due

i just got this lil project together. video compiling of the roadtrip tar and i took. i already wrote a blog post on it, but i didn't work hard on this vid for nothing.

so you might think it's long..... but times it by 150 and that's closer to the real length of the roadtrip! killer!!!

enjoy :)

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

words of love

right now i'm listening to elder holland's talk. oh man! i know he's talking to priesthood holders- but it's touched me :)
he loves missionaries :) just like me. he understands. the Spirit understands. God understands. hence....
"but for health or other reasons or impediments beyond their control they cannot do so. we publicly and proudly solute this group.we know of your desires and applaud your devotion. you have our love and admiration. you are on the team. even as you are honorably excused." 
what words of love <3
i prolly shouldn't be blogging as i'm listening.  well i am.

also words of love...... it's email day :) you see this blog will soon be OVER RUN with memories and events of chase and i..... in 11 weeks. and eventually, hopefully, cross your fingers, pray, work hard that it will be an official "chase-marissa" blog soon :) so i'll ease you into it and keep his love alive on this blog.

I am dreaming of you regularly now, i miss you tons. i loved conference. 
i loved the talk of elder andersen and i can not wait to start a family with you! i am growing every day so i can be the best husband possible for you! 
i am so happy you went to conference. i know it was hard but the Lord gives us difficulties to see if we are really faithful through it all. we will serve many couple missions, i know its not the same. but stay strong because i love you and the lord loves you so much, have a great week. you're constantly on my mind!
elder anderson 

one reason loving chase comes easy??
when you know the Lord trusts them, it's easier for you to trust them with your heart.

In the words of Elder Hollands, nothing better to say to your posterity than......
In this family, we serve missions!

My family is full of missionary work. especially these two!
in europe then and.... europe, where he is now!

two years ago. when we officially said I.L.O.V.E.Y.O.U.

and now (well after i get off work), i'll be off to do missionary work for those on the other side. jordan river temple this afternoon :) never been to that one! i'm excited :)

ahhhh late for work. really got get ready and run!

Monday, October 3, 2011

real fhe

tonight i had real fhe :) most important word about fhe is the f for family!! other fhe is an imposter and i cannot support it :)
boondocks with the schroedter cousins. a round of mini golf! good times. i lost. i don't want to talk about it.
we took scores very seriously- hence kyle. ps i did get a hole in one :) that i will talk about! 

Sunday, October 2, 2011

hard to handle

this weekend.
hard to handle. for two main reasons
#1. just had a breakdown on my drive home..... i went to conference today (which was awesome) but cried during yamashita's and cook's talk. i love missionaries. i loved being one even more.
i saw sooooo many of my sisters today and it was great. but then it caused my heart to break. i miss it sooooo much. i should be there.
but like i learned too many times today.
God is aware of our suffereing and our purpose is to align ourselves with the lord and His spirit- not the other way around. oh man.
but I cannot help my mind from being upset, angry, and even resentful. my heart is broken. 
it's funny how your heart can break because of family, romance, sin, health, and missing something. i've never hurt with missing something this much before- and that's saying something- i mean i moved around my whole life. the boy i'm in love with has been gone.
but nothing hurts like the longing i have for being a missionary on temple square.
on a positive note- i know how blessed i am. well not the extent prolly but i do realize i'm a daughter of God with many blessings.
it was so amazing to go to conference. sleep at laur's and watch another horrible movie. spend the day with the wilders- especially michael. have dinner with indiana people. have fun with my co-workers. go to the temple. get some good sleep! byu finally played semi-okay and won. but what was best was definitely the Spirit, the love of temple square, and Conference.
in the car! getting pumped! 
what a beautiful site!
excited to hear the apostles! and other disciples of Christ.

#2. working the priesthood session shift at retail is death. period. crazy mormon women come out to throw down the big bucks while their husbands are busy. it's worse than black friday. normally i always remember to request the saturday night off for conference weekend but i'm not in the groove of being back at work yet...... i won't forget next conference. i can promise you that. there is no point in watching saturday session "live" because when you go to work at night you are full of angst, tension, and hate. so it's better to work saturDAY and then have the night off and watch them online. i promise you!